So I’m just a month shy towards celebrating the anniversary of my singlehood (I mean literally and figuratively single). I can’t count the number of times people have asked me why I still don’t have a boyfriend as much as I can’t count the number of times I’ve decided not to write nor talk about relationships and or love. My male friends would always tease me about my relationship status as though my love life is some kind of a puzzle that needs to be solved.
So for the umpteenth time, I’m going to tell this to those who find my love life more interesting than global warming…
I am still single because I chose to be single.
Well, probably not entirely out of choice but with the given options I’d rather be single.
Don’t worry; I am not going to quote Paulo Coelho on this and I’ll try my very best to reason out why. I am 32 and in the norms of the society, women of my age should have been married and have kids. Psh, I got this fabulous job at a wonderful country and living the high life, why would I ruin it just to follow the norm?
Don’t get me wrong here, I am no man-hater nor am I a lesbian much less a materialistic girl. I think I’ve grown mature enough to understand that love is more than the superficial. Love is about compromises, trust, respect and understanding. Love isn’t about you nor is it solely about him. Love means having that ingenuity to yield on each other’s differences, having faith and trusting each other. And maybe I haven’t found that guy whom I’d be so much willing to give up a part of my present just to keep him in my life…and or vice versa.
So no matter how persistent the people around me are at pestering me, I’m not going to budge in. This is my story, my future and my life so I’ll live it in my own terms.
And I’ll tell this to all the single ladies out there, I know this may sound like a cliché but I’ll say it anyway… Never ever settle for someone who is far less than what you deserve. I’ve been into multiple relationships for all the wrong reasons and apparently it did not last. Believe me, it is more fulfilling to be single than to be with someone who will surely break your heart. You won’t even have to feel guilty buying that nice little skirt at Zara because you don’t have a boyfriend who wants a Tag Heuer Aquaracer watch for an anniversary gift. I’m not telling you not to follow your heart, what I’m trying to say here is that you have to load yourself with tons and tons of vitamin B12. Be a smart-ass. Don’t rely solely on that feeling because it will eventually fade away. Don’t jump into a relationship just because your friends think he’s cute. Don’t jump into a relationship just because the people around you think you should. Don’t treat relationship as though it’s a game where you could practice. Save yourself from a heartbreak, have patience and learn how to wait.
At the end of the day, other peoples’ opinion on you is inane. What matters the most is how you answer this question: are you happy, satisfied and secured?
Because I am.